Shame and Guilt are two words that get used interchangeably in today’s world. Although each can be thrown around loosely, there is a difference. Guilt comes from the awareness of you knowing not to do something and still doing it. Guilt can birth shame. Shame is about how we see ourselves and how we believe others see us.

We can do something wrong and feel guilt. We do not have to do something wrong to experience shame. Shame says “I am bad” where guilt says “I did something bad.” As a coach, it’s important to distinguish the difference between the two words that a client may share.

When you identify the emotion accordingly, then you know what path to take and to serve that client. Without clarifying, you may find yourself running in circles and driving the client’s beliefs deeper and deeper.

Narcissistic people can experience shame yet not feel guilty. The lack of empathy prevents narcissistic people from experiencing guilt because they usually collapse the ability to imagine how someone else may feel.

When we brand ourselves with the label of shame, we start to take on a disempowering identity. This can cause us to fall short in our own eyes and cripple us. We must be careful with the labels we choose to experience since it can have a ripple effect.

Everyone successful person has a ritual to set goals. Most people that are unsuccessful lack the discipline to set goals. They have no target that they are moving towards. If you want an extraordinary 2018, you need to gain massive clarity on what you want. It has to be so compelling that get excited to go after it. It should create a drive for you that will make you wake up early and go to bed late.

When you set goals, you have to have a purpose for what you’re doing. If you want to spring into action, your purpose must fill you up to the point where you want to take action. This will help you have success towards your goals. When you set goals or have a goal-setting session, you want to make sure that you follow the simple and effective process that was laid out in the video.

Success requires action, and that action must be pointed in the direction that you set your goals. If you want to Master Life By Design, know your target, purpose and have a plan. That’s how you will have great success in 2018.

Goal setting is the foundation of all success.

Coming Soon…

Have you ever not wanted to do something? Maybe you didn’t want to get up in the morning or do your daily workout. The reason why we make ourselves go through the things we don’t want to do is to discipline our body. It will be difficult at first, but your when you learn to discipline the body, it will eventually surrender.

The key is to take the first step in spite of fear. Joe spoke about the steps he took to prepare for the Kokoro Seal Fit Challenge. Though it was an extremely difficult challenge to prepare for, he took small steps to prepare, including unpleasant activities like taking cold showers. He didn’t want to, but he knew he had to do so.

When you don’t want to take action, you may just hope that things will change. Hope is not an effective strategy. We have to consciously create our future. Ask yourself what you are looking to achieve in your life. You may not feel like taking action, but you must do it anyway. And when you do it, you will feel amazing!

Start by taking baby steps. Do one new thing each day. Little by little, you are disciplining your body to surrender into the new routine.

If you don’t have a role model or mentor, consider finding someone to look toward in different areas of your life. What are the disciplines that they have?

Try this: Draw a line down a page in a notebook. On the left-hand side, write down all the qualities of someone that you would not want to be like. On the right-hand side, write down the qualities that you would like to have and that you would want in a mentor. Start disciplining your body to build those same habits and belief systems. Over time, you will see that you have those same qualities as your role model, and you may even find yourself in a similar position.

Remember, when you can’t, you must!

TAKE ACTION

Take on the 10 Day Cold Shower Challenge! If you complete it, let us know on the MLBD Facebook Page and share the benefits you received as a result!

Love this episode? Leave us a review on iTunes and connect with us by joining our tribe on Facebook! 

Make today count!

Have you ever played with the power of intention? The idea is to focus on what you want and watch it manifest in your life. This is often achieved through the use of affirmations or incantations which tell our minds exactly what we’d like it to focus on. Essentially, our thoughts and feelings are creating our reality.

This is so important because at any moment, we are surrounded by 2,000,000 bits of information. However, our mind consciously picks up on only 126 of these bits of information. Therefore, when we can direct our minds to focus on what is important to us, we are better aligned for success.

A perfect example of this is a popular video called The Invisible Gorilla. People are instructed to watch the basketball and white shirts, and do not notice the gorilla right in front of them. It proves the point that you do not pick up on everything in your environment. Your dreams and desires could be a gorilla walking past you that you don’t see. And if you are not doing visualizations, affirmations, or incantations to tell your mind what to focus on consistently, there is a slight possibility that it is staring you in the face.

What in your life is a gorilla?

TAKE ACTION

It’s time to step up and create the life that you were destined to live. Decide what you want to create in your life. Choose something that you’ve been putting off. Begin telling yourself a new story that your dream or goal is achievable or attainable. Then start to create powerful incantations around what you want to create. Visualize and tell your unconscious mind what you would like it to pick up on.

Love this episode? Leave us a review on iTunes and connect with us by joining our tribe on Facebook! 

Make today count!

Have you seen this video by Steve Harvey about “making the jump?” If not, check it out!

This video perfectly sums up how it feels to know that you want more out of life—that there’s something else out there for you. When you’re on the precipice of a decision, do you stay where it’s comfortable or do you make the jump to chase your dreams? Sometimes the only way to find out is to actually make the jump.

We are all made with some special purpose within us. If you haven’t found it yet, it will be revealed if you seek it. You have a responsibility to determine what your special gift is. Something is calling your heart. What are you being called to do?

When you discover what your gift is, you can give it back to people in this world. This doesn’t have to be achieved through your day job. This can be a hobby that you love to do. Try this exercise: set a timer for three minutes and ask yourself the question, “What do I love?” During that three minutes, write out all that you love to do. Then look back at your list and take time every day to do something that you love.

If you feel that what you love to do can serve as your primary source of income and/or could potentially replace your 9 to 5, you may be considering “making the jump.” You may be holding back due to fear. Many who don’t make the jump feel the need to be prepared with education before starting. Though education has its importance, your heart is what will pull you through the challenging times.

You know what you need to do. You may need a little more strength and guidance. If you feel the calling in your heart, trust it and make the jump. Your parachute may not open right away, but you are determined and resilient enough to achieve your goals. Don’t settle for average. You deserve more and you are worth it.

TAKE ACTION

Write down what challenges you would encounter if you made the jump. Then, write down what would happen if you made the jump. Who would you become? How would you feel? How much gratitude would you have? Write everything down that you would have as a result of having the jump.

If you know that you need to make the jump and you need some accountability, reach out to us at [email protected] or [email protected]. Our team is ready to assist you!

Join our tribe on Facebook! 

Make today count!

The words we use are so powerful that they even have the ability to create our reality.

Words we speak cause different biochemicals to be released in our brains, which can impact the way you feel and emotions that you experience. How we feel emotionally will cause us to take action or inaction, which creates real results in our lives, both positive and negative.

This can become a real problem when people experience negative self-talk, both verbally and within their minds.

Instead, when we want to create or manifesting something, we want to create the emotion that that desired outcome will give us. Use your words to do this. Tell yourself before bed that you are going to have a great day tomorrow. You will wake up tomorrow feeling recharged, rested, and ready to take on the day. Use these affirmations to redefine your reality.

You are never not prophesizing over your life. The words you use are constantly being planted in the universe. Remember to use words that are compelling, emotional, and that resonate with you.

If you want to make changes in your life, start to tell a new story. Speak it or write it down—either way, you are paving the path to your new future. Eventually, you will be living in your new story. This technique is the exact method Christina used to change her reality.

Speak using terms of abundance. For example, the word “try” allows us to play small and justifies our ability to not follow through. Hold yourself to a higher standard and remove that safety net.

Check in with yourself throughout the day to verify your self-talk. Are you speaking in terms of abundance and positivity or are you speaking from negativity and scarcity?

You can have everything that you desire in your life. You have the ability to be who you want and accomplish your goals. Simply fine-tune the words you use, take consistent action, and watch your new reality unfold.

TAKE ACTION

We want to hear your successes with using words to create your reality! Leave a comment!

Don’t forget to join our tribe on Facebook!  Check it out–Master Life By Design Facebook group.

Make today count!

What if, at the beginning of your life, someone told you that you are dying? Would you continue to live your life in the same manner that you do now? Probably not.

We all have dreams of things that we’d like to do and goals that we’d like to achieve, but many do not take action. Why is this? Simply put, we think we have time. The truth is that life is short and we really do not know how much time we actually have. A perfect reason to take action today!

What is it that your heart is calling you to do? Do you want to start a business? Are you trying to find the love of your life? Whatever it is that you desire, go after your dreams. Don’t put it off until tomorrow. Make a declaration and schedule the time on your calendar to take action.

You are special. You have unique gifts that you want to share with the world. Perhaps you know there is something more out there for you, but you’re not sure what it is. Write down three things that bring you joy and excitement and brainstorm how you can spend every moment living in a happy, wonderful state.

Feed your spirit on a daily basis. Try meditation, journaling, spending time with loved ones, or any other activity that revives your soul.

Life is short and you deserve to be authentically happy. If you are carrying fear, pain, and suffering, the only person you are hurting is yourself. Release these negative states of emotion and begin living the life you desire and deserve!

TAKE ACTION

What is your big vision about life? What feeds your spirit? Leave a comment!

If you’re feeling defeated and you don’t know what steps to take to make a change, let’s talk!  Visit masterlifebydesign.comand sign up for your free 30-minute results session to see how we can help!

Don’t forget to join our tribe on Facebook!  Check it out–Master Life By Design Facebook group.

Make today count!

Finances are an important pillar of Master Life by Design. Today, we’ll be sharing real world principles that can help anyone improve their financial situation.

First, you need to know why you want to become a master of your money. What will drive you when things get tough?  What will keep you disciplined?  Write out all of these reasons.

Your beliefs are very important when it comes to mastering your money.  We adopt belief systems from a young age, including those related to money. When you’re in significant debt, it’s easy to feel that you’ll never get out of your current situation.  You need to switch your thoughts and adopt a belief that you’re making positive changes in your finances.  Identify what beliefs you’ve had about money in the past, but also capture new empowering thoughts that you will have regarding your finances.

When mastering your money, the first step is eliminating your debt. This will take sacrifices, but remember, it’s not always going to be like this.

Once you start paying off your debt, begin saving a percentage of your income instead of a set dollar amount, so you can adjust in the event of an income increase or decrease.  Live by the “pay yourself first” principle and save money first.  It’s also important to know your monthly expenses so you can determine how much you want in the bank for an emergency.

It’s also important to start developing a mindset of abundance and giving back.  This is a blessing to others and lights us up on the inside.  It can be something small such as a cup of coffee.  These small steps will help to condition you to come from a place of abundance rather than scarcity.

Consider joining forces with an accountability partner, consulting the expertise of a fiduciary, or checking out a few great books such as MONEY Master the Game by Tony Robbins and Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker.

TAKE ACTION

Would you love some guidance around mastering your finances?  Let’s chat!  Visit masterlifebydesign.com and sign up for your free 30-minute results session to see how we can help!

Don’t forget to join our tribe on Facebook!  Check it out–Master Life By Design Facebook group.

Make today count!

When determining what you want in an ideal partner, it’s so important to get clear on what you desire in the sexual/intimate experience.  After all, this intimacy brings a couple closer together.  There is much power in saying “yes” to your partner’s desire for intimacy.

So, why is it so important to say yes to your partner?

First, saying yes to your partner’s desire for sex provides certainty.  Certainty should be the number one need fulfilled in an intimate relationship.  At home is the primary place where certainty should be fulfilled.  If it is given, it will not be sought elsewhere.

Just imagine if you constantly said “no” to your partner’s desire.  Imagine these no’s stacking over time.  This puts your partner in a vulnerable position.  Soon that partner will become conditioned to the idea that they will always hear “no” if they ask, and eventually, they may stop asking.  This can lead to seeking sexual or emotional fulfillment outside of the relationship, whether it be in the form of attention from another person or with pornography.

If you find yourself hesitating to say “yes” to your partner’s desires, check in and see where your focus is.  What you’re focused on is what you’re going to feel.  Instead of focusing on the reasons to say “no,” focus on how much you love your partner and how great the experience will be.  This will help to shift your view.

Saying “yes” to your partner’s desire is just one piece that builds the lasting bond and trust between you as a couple. Each one of you deserves to be in a happy, loving, and passionate relationship.  Know your partner’s love language and consciously speak it every day.  Know and ask your partner what turns them on.  Keep open communication and continue to give to each other.

TAKE ACTION

Are you in a relationship rut?  Need help in finding your ultimate partner?  Go to masterlifebydesign.com and sign up for your free 30-minute results session to see how we can help!

We’re back in San Diego!  We’ll be doing meet ups in the local area, so stay tuned to our Master Life By Design Facebook group for details.

Make today count!